—— Guides · Glossary
What does Metamour mean?
A metamour is a partner's partner — someone you are connected to through your partner but who is not your own romantic or sexual partner. Managing metamour relationships well is a core skill in polyamory.
The word metamour (sometimes hyphenated as meta-amour) fills a linguistic gap: English has no native word for 'my partner's other partner.' The French-rooted 'amour' (love) plus 'meta' (beyond, between) produces a term that is both precise and community-specific.
Metamour relationships vary enormously. In kitchen-table polyamory, metamours may be genuine friends who enjoy each other's company independently of the shared partner. In parallel polyamory, metamours may be aware of each other's existence without any direct contact. In either case, how metamours choose to relate — if at all — is entirely up to them.
In the Lifestyle, the metamour concept is less central because play connections are typically less romantically structured. But in polycules or long-term Lifestyle friendship groups, the metamour dynamic can arise: your long-term play couple has other play partners, and you occasionally cross paths at events. Understanding the term helps navigate those encounters gracefully.
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