Where can I find a glossary of lifestyle terms?

The lifestyle community has developed a rich vocabulary over decades, partly for efficiency and partly as a social signalling system. Knowing the terms helps you communicate precisely about what you are and are not open to, which prevents misunderstandings and wasted conversations.

The most important terms for new couples to understand are swap preferences (soft swap vs full swap), relationship structure terms (ENM, open relationship, polyamory, hotwife, stag and vixen), and community-specific terms (unicorn, hall pass, DADT — Don't Ask Don't Tell).

DADT arrangements — where partners agree to outside connections without disclosing specifics to each other — are practised by some couples but are controversial within the lifestyle community. Many experienced participants argue that DADT creates a structure that is incompatible with genuine consent, since one partner cannot consent to specifics they do not know.

The JoinTheSwing glossary at /guides/glossary covers these and many more terms with plain-language definitions, context for how the terms are used in practice, and links to relevant guides. It is freely available to anyone, no account required.

If you encounter a term in a profile or conversation that is not covered in the glossary, it is perfectly acceptable to ask what it means. The lifestyle community generally welcomes genuine questions from people who are clearly approaching in good faith.